That's All I Can Say
by Cuirlfox369
Summary: I'm Different. And this is my story, all that I know and can say.  SPOILERS One-shot


**First off: THIS FIC CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS FOR PORTAL 2! IF YOU HAVEN'T PLAYED THE GAME, WATCHED SOMEONE ELSE PLAY IT, OR WATCH GAMEPLAY, TURN AROUND RIGHT NOW AND READ THIS AFTER YOU'VE DONE ANY OF THE THINGS LISTED ABOVE. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!**

I knew a lot. I didn't know how I knew, I never had to learn, but I still knew some things.

I forget- or perhaps it never happened- when I first awoke. Perhaps there is a limit to the amount of memory one turret could hold? Regardless, I do remember being thrown out- for being defective apparently. But I wasn't defective- I knew that my only flaw was a flickering beam. I was simply different.

I was put with turret parts that failed inspection as well as the rest of the trash the facility accumulated. Piece by piece, we were dropped into tubes and carried closer to the redemption line incinerator.

I didn't know how I knew it ended in that.

Then one day, the tube I was in shook. I remember wondering if this was what an earthquake felt like. Noises similar to roars and explosions followed. What had been going on? To this day, I don't know. Without warning, everything in the universe seemed to stop- at least in the small universe known as Aperture. The conveyor belt that was carrying me and other trash ceased along with any and all movement.

I felt joyous. Death would not claim me! In moments, joy became puzzlement tinted with fear. What _was_ going to happen to me? Would whatever battery I had slowly run out? Did _she_ have a worse death prepared for me than this? I waited. For what, I didn't know. Anything. Any certainty of what was to come.

Nothing happened.

Time passed, I suppose. I spent time going through all that I did know and wondering about that which I didn't. Bit by bit the facility began rusting away before my red optic. Dust, dirt and grime quickly covered anything it could reach.

Then things changed. It was in no way like how it stopped, a quick, sudden and strange occurrence. This was a slow change. There was a distant rumble, glass breaking, movement. Something- someone- was out there. I waited, begging- no, praying to whatever gods cared for this poor turret that he or she pass this way.

Someone must be told.

Finally, someone did pass by- a girl in an orange Aperture jumpsuit, carrying a blue core. _Orange and blue,_ I thought vaguely. _Colors that have so far meant both hope and destruction._

"Hello? Hello? Excuse me?" I said, hoping for any help. The girl paused, despite the blue core's protests. It occurred to me that she couldn't reach past the tube to save me. "...thanks anyway."

The girl watched me warily and began walking away. I didn't want to die and have no one remember me. I decided on giving her a name to remember me by. I needed to decide soon, before she was out of earshot. I thought instantly about why I was in my predicament in the first place.

"Hello? Hello?... I'm Different." I called sadly.

All I could do was hope she had heard me, and wait for whatever followed. Eventually, the conveyors and tubes began again. _She_ had awoken and was rebuilding the facility. I watched the passing scenery and again waited.

You'll find turrets are quite good at waiting.

Through tubes and conveyors I was carried, wondering where the end was and how much longer it was until I reached it. Would it be painful? Would I shut down before the worst of it?... Did I have a soul? If so, what would happen to it? I knew most humans seemed to believe there was a place where souls were sent depending on what they did in life. If I didn't have a soul, would I just disappear?

That didn't seem right somehow.

Finally, I heard the incinerator. Any hope I had left was dashed in an instant. I could have cried, an action humans did to show sadness, had I been able to. All that changed was my single beam used to detect targets flickered more that it had before. I suppose that was the closest to tears I could hope for.

"Turret redemption lines active," an announcer said. It seemed as if I couldn't even suffer with dignity. I was just another piece of trash, rejected yet deemed salvageable enough to be sent here. "Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption." Wait, why would it say that? There's no one here- "Turret redemption lines are not rides, please exit the turret redemption line." Wait! The girl from earlier! Could it be?

I tried to keep my beam steady in the hope of being seen. The conveyor carried me closer to the crusher. Suddenly I could see the room, no tube to close me in. I saw her come closer, holding that same portal gun. The blue core was gone, but I knew it was the same girl. She came closer, so much I was afraid she mistook me for a normal turret. Then again, why wouldn't she? I looked like a normal turret.

"I'm Different!" I cried at loud as my voice allowed me to, praying she would remember me. The girl paused for a moment, as if trying to recall something. After a moment, she picked me up with the grip function on her portal gun. "Thank you," I said, regretting that there were limits as to what words I could use. A simple thanks would never cover what I owed her now. She began leaving the conveyor as ten thousand thoughts streamed through my mind.

I had to tell her what I did know, anything to help prepare her for what was to come. The recordings! I had to explain what I could remember, lest she not see it and lose hope. "Get mad!" I said, knowing that wouldn't reach her. "Don't make lemonade!" A little more specific, but still no good. She wouldn't understand until she heard _his_ recordings herself.

A clip passed through my mind of events soon to unfold. I paused for a moment, pitying this poor girl. A betrayal, a friend, a goodbye. She was tangled in this web, aided in both direct and indirect ways. All of it opened itself to me, but I could describe to her none of it. The words failed me- literally. My system wasn't capable of using the words I knew could tell her- warn her even. I still had to try.

"Prometheus was punished by the gods for giving the gift of knowledge to man. He was cast into the bowels of the earth and pecked at by birds." Man was foolish. Knowledge was power. He was punished for giving power to fools, a dangerous combination. After the betrayal, both this girl and _she_ would be cast down into the depths of the facility. Only _she_ would be pecked at by birds. Whether she chose to be the only one pecked or not, I didn't see.

I saw their first plan, a paradox. I wanted to tell her to not return to his clutches, that the plan would fail and she would be put in more danger still. Even after that, their next plan would fail also. Explosions would stop this girl, and I prayed it didn't kill her. Any knowledge of what would follow resisted me. That would be up to her, but I still pressed onward. "It won't be enough," I said, hoping she would remember it when _she_ suggested the paradox plan and when she began fighting against the moron again.

I continued to mentally press forward as she continued carrying me, slowly downward to the railing below. Looking down, I began to think of what I could tell her next. If I couldn't tell her what was to happen, I could at the least tell her where she needed to be.

"The answer is beneath us."

No, too vague. I must say more! I had to! "_Her_ name is Caroline." I couldn't show the emphasis on the word 'her,' but it was the most straightforward thing I had said so far. "Remember that," I said. If nothing else reached her, this had to.

I searched myself for any bit of information I could give her further. I drew a blank. I wracked my mind for anything that might help her, anything I could say that could equal my gratitude. Nothing. Sadly- even though my voice was incapable of showing such emotion- I said, "That's all I can say."

By now, we had walked along the catwalk and reached where it led into a room close to a turret testing chamber. I could here the turrets and the defectives in the distance. I wasn't concerned about what I heard. I was concerned about what I saw. In front of us was an emancipation grid. I knew entering it would mean certain death for me. For a single moment, I believed that this girl would plunge into it- uncaring of my fate.

It was a foolish assumption.

The girl paused for a moment before turning and setting me down on the catwalk. We understood there was yet again nothing she could do to save me. I suppose I accepted that. I tried to find any sign that she had listened to a single word I had said. She crouched down and gave me a small pat on the head.

I knew she had decided to keep what I said in mind, even if she didn't fully understand it.

I knew that small gesture was her way of saying 'Goodbye. Take care of yourself.'

I knew this girl was going to live.

I know how I knew. It was the look in those pale eyes. This girl would fight at the very door of hell's gates before she let herself give up. She had already seen hell's gates and pulled herself out from it. The fact she was alive in this universe proved that she would live.

She stood and walked through the grid, leaving me behind.

I wondered if she would remember me when this was all said and done. Maybe she would and what little I said would make sense. Maybe I would see this girl again one day. I didn't know.

As I watched her walk away, I said a silent goodbye to my only friend.

I suppose, in the end, there was a great deal I did know. Still, there was a lot a didn't know. What I did know, I couldn't explain entirely how I knew. It would almost be safe to say I knew nothing, but I believe in myself just enough to know that isn't true.

There is one thing I will always know as true: I am Different.

That was my last thought as the battery installed in my body gave out. Telling the girl what I could had killed my energy that had been deteriorating all these years. I was willing to accept it. Nothing could save the life of this unfortunate turret. I closed my optic, accepting the situation. At least it ended the continuous cycle of hoping and waiting.

I floated up towards a light.

I was enveloped in peaceful white.

And that's all I can say.

**I actually finished the rough draft of this a few weeks ago, I'm just now getting around to tidying it up. I loved the different turret and figured it needed a little story. I hoped you enjoyed it! Please R&R!**

**Also, I own nothing!**


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